A Wyvern’s Tale The KOmpetition is over: The KO News is the best


Here it is, my final Wyvern’s Tale. I could write a whole college essay on what I’ve learned from the KO News (and I did) but there are some things that college admissions offices might not appreciate as much. So here are some things everyone should know about the KO News:

1. We love puns. See our articles “Playwright Sarah Ruhl rules KO at last,” “Sarah Ruhl to rule KO at a later date,” and “Sarah surely did rule KO.” Puns are the life force of the KO News. If the front page doesn’t have a pun, please submit a formal complaint to the Editor-in-Chief. 

2. We are undeniably the best basketball team on campus, no practice necessary. You might recall the championship match of December 2019. I won’t name names, but our undefeated record speaks for itself. 

3. We’re overqualified. What other club on campus requires a (fantastic) class just to join? Don’t get me wrong, it’s 1000% worth it, but the KO News is BFFs with blood, sweat, and tears (mostly just tears). 

4. We don’t just boast pizza at planning meetings. Does your generic KO club have a faculty advisor who brings you bagels on Sunday mornings? I think not. 

5. Speaking of Sunday mornings, where else would you want to be at 8 a.m. than in the library? But seriously, it’s always pajama day at the News ($2 dress down payment not required). 

With all this being said, I do have to end with the sappy sentiment, and I’m sending all the editors, the web staff, the photo staff, Ms. Schieffelin and Ms. Hojnicki socially distanced air hugs because the KO News has easily been my favorite and most memorable experience at KO.